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4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets.5. Even if you're certain that you are included in the will, it is still considered tacky to drive aU-Haul to the funeral home.DINING OUT1. When decanting wine, make sure that you tilt the paper cup, and pour slowly so as not to"bruise" the fruit of the vine.2. If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label.ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME1. A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist.2. Do not allow the dog to eat from the table ... no matter how good his manners are.PERSONAL H YGIENE1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN truck keys.2. Proper use of toiletries can forestall bathing for several days. However, if you live alone, deodorant is a waste of good money.3. Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a social no-no, as they tend to detract from a woman's jewelry and alter the. ‘erm? er?. You know I’m straight right?’ ‘It’s a FORFEIT Jason? you can’t go back on it now’ Sally said. ‘I’ll tell you what mate I’ll give you a break since your luck has been terrible tonight. How about double or quits on the next hand?’ Tom asked reasonably. I did some quick mental calculation. There was only a 1 in 3 chance I’d lose the next hand. ‘What do you mean double or quits?’ I asked as my mind raced. ‘Well either you give me a blow job now, or, IF you lose the next hand you agree to be our sex toy for the rest of the night? It’s a good deal, your luck has got to change soon right?’ Having mental flashbacks to that evening a year ago I really, REALLY didn’t want to have to suck cock. ‘Ok it’s a deal’ I said praying I’d win the next hand. I figured if I won I’d call it a day explain I didn’t want to play anymore and leave. The cards were dealt and I was almost euphoric to have a flush. We all showed our hands and I was slightly miffed to see Sally reveal four 4’s. But that.
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