Feeling silly for finding this young man so attractive, I let those feelings slip away.It was easy around Jake. We talked about our paid jobs, how we planned to send our kids to college, and all things fire related. And as we got closer I reluctantly talked about the abuse in my marriage and Jake told me of his relationship gone sour because of details too lengthy to list. It was nice to have someone to confide in who I trusted to keep my issues between us. One thing that attracted me to Jake is that I couldn’t get enough of his smile and the way he’s always so playful with me. None of the men I worked with joked around with me. I’m sure that the chief set them all straight from the beginning, worried I would cry sexual harassment at the faintest drop of a joke. Jake was different. He gave me a hard time when I deserved it and put me in my place when I needed it. He laughed at my broken bra strap after a difficult car extrication, told me he knew I tried my best after a failed. . lead male character, early twentiesLOVE!Will I ever really love? Will another ever love me? I dream of love. I fantasized about love. I want love--a true love, a real lover. But me, the shy wallflower? All I can do is hope.My twentieth birthday was yesterday, January 31 and mother asked, "Karen, are you going to the Valentine dance next month?" You're kidding. I don't even have a boyfriend, let alone a date to that annual town dance, mother, you know that." Why don't you have a boyfriend, Karen? You goin' to be an old maid on me?" MOTHER!"I stormed out of the room, tears streaming down my face.All through high school, now two years over thank God, I was the studious one. I didn't like or participate in sports or much of anything else for that matter. I was straight A for all four years. I guess I was the female version of a nerd. I even had the ugly eyeglasses to go with the image.Boys scared me to death. They also teased me to death. How could I like one of them, let alone love one.
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