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But tonight, these silly little girls know nothing of the kind, as we mark them.We agree on 20, each man choosing 2. We nod to each other in agreement. I speak into the earpiece I wear, and one minute later the front door, the side doors, and the kitchen door all crash open as the police pour into the banquet hall. It is chaos and pandemonium. Massive amounts of drugs appear seemingly out of nowhere. The police out-number the 200 guests, and everyone is arrested. I have been through this routine countless times, and the terror is delicious as I taste it in the air. Sadly, I never tire of it. I nod to the two Officers that have been assigned to me, and through my earpiece I tell them which two girls I have selected from the table I was serving as the waiter. As all of the 200 guests are arrested and put into Police buses waiting to take them to jail, 20 of the guests- all young girls are put onto a special Police bus. In all of the confusion, no-one notices. This bus will not be with. "That led us to exchange a few horror stories we'd stored up about incompetent stage directors. My most amusing was one I hadn't actually been involved in but had only heard about, a director who'd wanted Madeleine Contras to actually mount up on her horse at the end of Wagner's Götterdämmerung. Madeleine had reportedly argued with him for days before she agreed to try it, but by then the horse had got a good look at all three hundred pounds of her and bolted the minute she put a foot in the stirrup. Madeleine went flat on her ass, and the horse was replaced with a scrim projection of a picture by performance time."I'm absolutely convinced that animals don't belong on opera stages, but especially horses," she said. She recounted a tale of her early career when she was Micaela in Carmen and the director had Escamillo, the lead baritone, make his first entrance on horseback. That part went all right—"he was nothing like Madeleine's size, and he could actually ride, which was why they.
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