. Medicare pays $43 of it.This one is compliments of JerryYou Know You Are In A Redneck Church If... ... people ask, when they learn that Jesus fed the 5,000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish, and what bait was used to catch 'em. ... when the pastor says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering," five guys and two women stand up. ... opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday. ... A member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of." ... The congregation of 500 members only has seven last names in the church directory. ... people think "rapture" is what you get when you lift something too heavy. ... the baptismal pool is a #2 galvanized washtub. ... the collection plates are hubcaps from a '56 Chevy. ... instead of bells, you are called to service by a duck call. ... the minister and his wife drive matching pickup trucks. ... the communion wine is Boone's. My knees come to rest next to his chest. Need. It explodes between my thighs, like a lance of fire spearing upwards and taking my breath away. The hands let go. I could hold myself up, easy slowly down on the huge spear of flesh, but I don’t need that. Time slows again while I relax my legs and let my whole weight impale me with his cock. I come, hard, screaming, but it’s just the start. Another cock presses against my bumhole. It’s dirty, depraved, unspeakably wicked. It’s exactly what I need right now, what the monster in me needs. He has gotten the hint, and he pushes his lubed cock inside without pause. My voice breaks. I’m delirious with pleasure. The start to move, and like well-acquainted dancers, we easily fall into a rhythm. Another cock touches my lips and welcome it, twirling my tongue around it, sucking it in deeply. Moans and grunts start to fill the air. Cameras go in and out of focus. I’m coming, coming, never really stopping. At some point, I’m riding another cock in.
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