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Now I have been fighting alcohol and d**g addiction since I was 11yrs old I was pretty much a full blown alcoholic by 14 and it was tough getting to 21 years old when I went to rehab although I did straighten up completely for about a year I have demons in me that just like to party so I quit drinking altogether as I was going to kill myself or worse someone else and if you have never had to battle any kind of addiction feel very blessed although we all have our demons as much as I hate addiction it is treatable given the person accepts the help me I just cant seem to get it but without alcohol life is so much easier now don't get me wrong all I mostly did from 21 until 47 was smoke week to me no big deal although I have been doing going on close to 40 years do I wish I never picked anything up I don't know the answer because I don't think I would have made it without it and again you either understand or you don't about the chaos going on in my head so without the numbing I don't. .. with a sort of a pepper taste to it."That's when we heard our parents door open and Ellen quickly reached over and turned out the light.We sat together in the darkness and listened to the sounds of Dad taking a squirt. Then the toilet flushed and we heard him go back to bed.Ellen got up and pulled her night-shirt on over her head."Thank's Ellie," I said, "that was great!"She leaned over the bed and kissed me with a passionate, open mouth. I could taste my sperm on her tongue as she did it. When she pulled her lips away, she looked into my eyes and sweetly whispered, "I love you, Danny." Then she stood up and quietly left the room.The next morning, I drove Ellen to school with me. She was very quiet on the way."What's with you?" I asked as I parked the Firebird."I don't know," she answered. "I feel kind of funny this morning." What do you mean "funny"?" I don't know, Danny. I just don't feel right about last night. I mean, it felt really good and all... I just feel really guilty and.
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