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The more attention I give an idea, the more it grows on me. I give being at Ed’s apartment all my attention. I hurry outside, not even saying goodbye to Barry’s mom. I run the whole way and am out of breath when I arrive at his front steps. I think the drug is wearing off. I have the beginning of a headache and can’t seem to summon a thought in my head. It took my last burst of motivation getting here. Now I have no will or desire left, it seems. I park my ass on Ed’s front steps and rest my head against the handrail. The whole world seems too bright. I can’t wait to be in Ed’s room, in the dark. I wonder when Ed will arrive and whether I’ll still be able to perform for him with the same enthusiasm. I’ll certainly try. The cognitive part of my thinking reflects on how Barry’s concoction affected me. Even as the drug metabolizes out of my system, decisions remain solidly established in my psyche – permanently me now, the new, more real me. It’s like when they take a baby elephant and. She must have been six feet tall and most of that was her legs! This woman had the longest legs she had ever seen and perfectly clad in sheer black nylon supported by heels which must have been at least six inches high! It took a real effort to prevent her jaw from dropping as the newcomer walked slowly and purposefully towards the counter. She let her eyes follow the amazing legs as they moved across the floor and her gaze moved upwards, taking in the very short black leather pleated skirt which revealed the lower edge of the thicker nylon at the top of her legs. Continuing higher, admiring the black satin bustier that fitted her trim waist perfectly and accentuated her full, but not large, breasts and trimmed with black lace and then... the face! What a face! So pretty and perfect and made up with black eye liner and mascara and dark, dark red lipstick covering her perfect lips. Her eyes were deep brown, black almost, and smouldering as they watched the Baristas looking at her.
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