Strip
I will answer my snail mail with the same enthusiasm with which I answer my e-mail.5. I resolve to back up my 1GB hard drive daily ... well, once a week ... okay, monthly then ... or maybe... 6. I will spend less time on the Internet. This, of course, will be hard to estimate since I’m not a clock watcher.7. When I hear a funny joke I won’t reply “LOL ... LOL!”8. I will read the manual ... just as soon as I can find it.9. I will think of a password other than “password.”10. I will stop checking my e-mail at 3:00 in the morning... 4:30 is much more practical.I’ve found that women are the chief cause of men’s lying. ... They insist on asking too damn many questions!!!Some bars have the strangest rules when ya think about it. I mean, why do I have to wear a shirt and tie to go in a bar to see a topless dancer.The Top 15 New Slogans for the Republican Party15. Putting the HIP back in Hypocrisy14. Adultery with Dignity13. $40 million is peanuts compared to what they want to give poor. How many did you give him?” “Ten, I think. It was going to be six, but I was a bit worked up.” “Sounds like it! Still, he’s lived to tell the tale, and it might have helped you with your decimals! How did he take it?” “Not very well. He was play acting a little I think! Jumping about. Wiggling his bottom like a girl. Kept saying ‘Oh, Nan!’ which really annoyed me. Sorry would have been more appropriate.” “Yes, indeed but I bet he was feeling really sorry for himself by the time you’d finished!” “Yes, I think so. He’s certainly minding his behaviour now.” “So I guess this was all on his bare bottom.” “Oh yes. Bare bottom. It’s a nice bottom, I must say. Anyway, I could hardly ask him to put his Y-fronts back on for the caning, could I? That would have been strange. His bottom was already bare. It’s a nice big penis he’s got, too. He’ll make a lucky girl very happy one day.” “Mum, you really are incorrigible!” “Maybe, but you two have been too soft on him over the years. His bottom has.
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