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Though against everything he espoused, his son's sexual exploits gave him a secret thrill. Floyd was rather ashamed of his lack of manliness, a major reason he had let his body go so miserably. Siring a son with very macho characteristics had helped to reaffirm his virility.At the same time he is thrilling to his son's exploits, the father is terrified of his daughter. He has no idea how to deal with her emotions, her sensitivity, and most of all her sexuality. He knows incest is wrong and the inevitable sexual attraction generates guilt in him. As a defense mechanism, he clamps down harder on the daughter.For Floyd, the strict teachings of his church about sex exacerbated his highly defensive approach to Lindsey's sexuality. He wholeheartedly supported his wife Mary's restrictions on their daughter.The mother in such a family is influenced by at least a couple of different forces. The feeling among women that sex is somehow shameful is far more pervasive than pop psychology would. “Hang on,” I said, “maybe we should talk. I’ve never done this before. Can you just sit here and talk with me a while?””I’m sorry, I didn’t know. Are you okay?”Uh, yeah. You just take my breath away. Sorry; I’m just new at this. Please forgive me. God your beautiful.” I was in overload; there were about a dozen things I wanted to tell her but that was the best I could do.She sat down next to me and held my hand, and we talked some more. She had an interest in photography and I told her how beautiful the moon and ocean would be captured on film. I told her about the stars where I was from and how if you were patient you could make out the Milky Way. She asked me about my lovers and I admitted there had been none; I was always interested in fulfilling my dreams, but I had to admit I wasn’t certain what they were anymore. We laughed, and when she went to kiss me on the cheek, it seemed natural to kiss her on the lips.She let her hands glide over my back and I held her and stroked her.
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